I am, by all accounts, a night owl. Growing up, I had a LOT of trouble falling asleep. Literally hours sometimes tossing and turning and staring at the ceiling, with or without music, too hot or too cold, screen time, no screen time, doesn’t matter. This pattern has continued through-out my life where I go from semi-normal for me (midnight to 1:00 a.m.) and going until 8:00 a.m. to not being able to fall asleep and pushing it to 2:00 or 3:00 a.m., and waking up at 6:30 or 7:00 at the latest.
Which of course then likely ends up with a crash sometime around 5:00 p.m. Earlier if I let it, later if I push through. The last couple of weeks have been tough. I feel like I’m sleeping but not getting any REM. My sleep machine monitor says otherwise. But I’m fighting migraines, sinus headaches, and just pressure in general, and it is sapping my energies.
Tonight I fell asleep around 6:30 and almost slept through dinner. I needed 30 minutes to get me moving again. J and I watched X-Men tonight, then I did some stuff on my desktop and website to set up a table for my music reviews, another tick mark on my to-do list on the whiteboard, and now I’m crashing at 10:30 p.m. Wish me luck.
I have been fighting a bug for a few days, a bit of congestion, a bit of a headache, a sore throat and the gastro issues I self-inflicted on Sunday messed up my sleep last night. I have been super active in the last few days, so I should have slept like a log according to the logic of my mother. I can even hear her voice saying it.
Instead, I woke up at 4:00 a.m. Tossed and turned, tried to go to the washroom without success, back to bed, another 90 minutes of staring at the ceiling metaphorically, back to the washroom with success, and finally crashed back to sleep around 6:00 I guess.
Woke up at 9:00 feeling like a zombie. Things have improved generally over the weekend, and my sore throat was mostly gone but my digestive issues were going batty, my congestion was back, and my CPAP machine gave me an air pressure headache to start the day. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t COVID-serious, just an annoying bug of some kind. But I decided to crash and take the day.
Andrea might have the same bug as of late tonight. Hopefully, she’ll do her normal great job of kicking it quickly. I have a bunch of stuff tomorrow for work, so I’ll definitely be “back”, but I might push a few meetings to later in the week and focus on the core duties.
This is a self-help guide to reducing your stress levels by choosing to care only about those things that are important to you.
What I Liked
I found this a very odd book to read. In almost every chapter, I found myself disagreeing with his evidence and examples, often thinking they proved the opposite of what he was trying to use them to prove, yet at the same time agreeing with some of the premises. It felt more like he had some solid ideas throughout, just not very well developed. Like, for instance, that we have limited bandwidth to care about things and therefore we should not care about a lot of unimportant stuff (hence the title), finding problems you like to solve (i.e. what you love), prioritizing better values for ourselves in line with what we love, and certainty being an enemy of growth (so you should risk failure more).
What I Didn’t Like
Most of his examples are Millenial-style rants, not actual evidence to support his arguments, and it is a lot of work to come to the conclusion “don’t sweat the small stuff and it is all small stuff”, but with swearing.
The Bottom Line
Not worth reading but at least I got a reading badge for it
Well, my first attempt with transparent commitment, public goals, everything arrayed to push me led initially to weight loss of about 30 pounds, and then regained about 15 of it. Strike one.
My second attempt, my “reboot” this year, was wiped out by depression and I ended up not only regaining all of the other 15 pounds I had first lost, but I also added another 5 on top of it. Pushing me to my largest weight ever, 345 pounds. Strike two.
So I’m working on a reboot plan, I know why it’s not working, and what I need to do, but apparently the online transparency plan isn’t working for me as a way of keeping my nose to the grindstone. I have a couple of new things to try, but I guess I’ll try those out on my own and post updates more sporadically. Stay tuned!
When last we saw our intrepid hero (i.e. me), he was facing a cliff-hanger of epic proportions (literally). He had plateaued, become relatively inert, started to despair, and wallowed in frustration. I needed a break. So I took one.
My “goal” for my break was to take my mental energy off my weight and health, and while I wasn’t planning to abandon all my new practices, I didn’t want to be tracking everything every day, only to see no progress. I stopped in early February, and planned to go to the end of March. That was this past Sunday.
So what did I do over the previous seven weeks?
On the positive side, I didn’t go completely crazy. I didn’t throw away my plans to eat breakfast more regularly, although I didn’t try to fight that hard to make it at home either. For snacks, I gave myself a break from preparing them by taking a financial hit, and so I bought my veggies at work more often than pre-chopping them at home. Lunches weren’t bad, but not great. A bit too much pizza thrown in as a treat rather than sticking to other healthier choices, but again, I didn’t go nuts either. I did better on drinking water through-out the day. And dinners stayed relatively the same. We tried out the Hello Fresh delivery service, and while the food was interesting, it also included more prep time than normal, and more prep time than say SupperWorks. We’ll stick with it a bit more, building up some extra recipes perhaps (the yakitori was great, also a couple of others), and then likely try some more SupperWorks. Finally, on the positive side, if I rely on measurement as my progress, my overall weight stayed relatively the same. Up and down a pound or two, but nothing much different than when I was plateaued. The real benefit is that I didn’t expend a lot of mental energy on it in the last seven weeks. That’s at least an indicator that some of the habits are part of my “new normal”.
On the negative side, I had a health scare in there for my heart, which turned out to be (likely) more reflux-related as my body gets used to my new meds. Speaking of which, I started taking a baby aspirin a day for my heart stuff, although my GP removed that from the regime now that my heart issues are “resolved” (i.e. no signs of a problem). I went up to five meds (2 BP, 1 diabetes, 1 reflux, 1 aspirin) and then down to three (dropped 1 BP and 1 aspirin), and then back up to four (added a cholesterol med). Long-term, maybe I can get rid of them all, but for now, we work with what we have.
Continuing on the negative side, I’ve been eating ice cream a little too regularly in the last seven weeks. Not excessively, but since it’s my Kryptonite, I was using Ross’ philosophy from Friends (“I was on a break!”) to allow myself to do it…DQ, Frosties, Laura Secord. It’s a slippery slope.
I’ve also been a giant house slug with the snow challenges. I’ve been hibernating way too much. Sigh.
But Monday marked my overall reboot, and the beginning of round 2 / attempt 2 to start the next 25 pound goal. It’s 10 weeks to my birthday, which is probably too short a time to get all 25 pounds lost, but I have smaller goals in there to get things done (like getting my basement done so I can work out in it — or as my new advisor, the Kinesiologist, suggests, I should picture the goal of getting the physical set-up in the right layout as the first exercise / workout). We had a great first appointment, and I suspect we’ll have 2-3 more before I’m fully on track for the future.
After restarting Monday, I can feel the challenge for the week…yesterday was my first day back at work with full menu control. Today I sacrificed a bit at lunch to have pizza with a friend, but I’ll adjust for it in my other items for the day. And I’m planning to BBQ on Saturday night. How wrong can the week go when it ends with BBQ?