Planning a wedding in six months – Part 7 – Parties, parties, and more parties — 6 Comments

  1. “my point is that about 50-60% of the honorees have ZERO interest in having or seeing strippers at all.”

    I call shenanigans! I want to see the data behind this crazy pronouncement.

    • 🙂 There’s a reason why strip clubs are not exactly everywhere…not enough business. And for the honorees, i.e. the groom to be, their headspace is usually so far from strippers, they’re often more embarrassed than anyone.

      • I regulate the adult entertainment establishment industry, and I can confirm that it’s not a growth industry, but that’s mostly due to the ready availability of porn/sexual experiences on the Internet. Bachelor parties are one area that I believe is still doing okay because a dozen guys around a monitor doesn’t quite have the same vibe.

        Arguably, the bachelor event is about creating memories and memorable moments, not making sure the groom is comfortable. Often the entire purpose is to (lovingly) embarrass the groom.

        I would never say that it’s for everyone, but to boldly throw out a figure like 50-60% seemed extreme. Mostly because I can’t imagine anyone has tried to gather that data so it feels like it’s based on some local anecdotes.

        • I agree it is entirely local but part of it is my internal math based on chatting with a number of guys when they tell me about having been to a b-party for someone. I suspect it is more like a bell curve — 20% are against going, 20% want to go, and the middle 60% get swung either way. Interestingly, I suspect much of my math is influenced by my sample size being increasingly older guys…we’re all past our “prime”. 🙂

          To me, for the math, the question is how much of that 60% is normal distribution vs. swayable, but let’s assume it’s even by personality types. We already have 20% by Bell curve.

          If you base it on personality profiles, you don’t have an even distribution of personality types by population nor by type but as I said, I will assume you do (the stats show more introverts than extroverts by preference)…the “analytical introverts” (call them the blues) generally prefer quieter and are deathly afraid of embarrassment. While they’re prone to titillation (i.e. as nerds), they are generally reserved on an individual level. 80% of them will avoid this type unless in a herd, and even then only do it uncomfortable. Let’s assume 60% to be safe, and they represent 15% of the 60%, so that’s 9% against by personality.

          For the “intuitive introvert” (call them the green nesters), they are subject to herd mentality, but they often want quieter, more personal interactions, not party-fests, and they’re often sensitive to the negative effects of any industry that involves exploitation, plus anything suggestive of infidelity. It’s near horrifying for them. I’ll estimate say 75-80% of them, which gives me another 11% on the conservative side.

          For the “analytical extrovert” (call them the reds), they’re type As and while they are often aggressive partiers, they also like to make decisions for themselves. I’ll push them a bit higher though and say the testosterone overrides decision-making, and would put them on the flip side of green, say only 3-4 of the 15% would be against.

          For the “intuitive extrovert” (call them the yellows), they are hard-core fun magnets. They are up for anything, anytime, anywhere. As long as it’s fun. However, they do not like embarrassing people, it detracts from the fun, so they’ll ONLY be excited to go if the groom is also willing to let go. If the groom is resistant, they are easily swayed. I would put them at 40-60%, cut it down the middle and I’ll say 7.5% against (basically coin flip for groom if even distribution, which I don’t think it is, but I’ll be generous).

          That gives me 20% curve, 9% blue, 11% green, 3% red, 7.5% yellow. Or 50.5% against. The percentages are about what you see in published marketing studies for vice-ware (views on legalization, usage, etc.), and the overall total is a bit lower than I’m seeing in personal conversations, but the personal conversations could be biased as they don’t want to seem like porn lovers…I just find it really interesting how many people I know have said a firm “No, not at all” as grooms, to the point where they’re willing to walk out on the b-party, as well as the number of stories where people have said “oh, we were doing x and y, and we had lots of people enjoying it, then we went to a strip club, and only a handful continued the party”. I even know a few friendships that have ended where the groom said “no, period” and one of their friends did it anyway. I know a couple of those grooms and for them it wasn’t “embarrassment”, it was pure unadulterated cruelty and disrespect. I suppose it depends on who is choosing the event — if the groom is into it, the curve shifts in favour — looking at the above math, I’d push that to a 60-70% in favour and 30-40% against.

          Would love to see my math tested …

          • I’m amused that you did the math!

            I was talking about the grooms themselves, not the other participants. A lot of participants are just there for support or to go along. I’ll readily agree that not a whole bunch of guys, especially older guys, get a big thrill out of going to a strip club anymore.

            And thinking on it, the last bachelor I went to, the (older) groom fled the strip club right before his wrestling match. But the rest of us had a lot of fun. Does that count? 🙂

            One day, in a non-public forum, I’ll have to share my own b-party experience with you. It’s an eventful tale, which was exactly the goal!

          • If you want, you can send it through the comment page for the ABOUT POLYWOGG area.

            And I thought about it some more, those stats only work (to the extent they work at all!) for men over 30…


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